Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Well I'm glad I made the decision to do all the bed moving last night because the new bed arrived at 8.30 in the morning. A good hour and a half before it was due! If I hadn't been organised I would have had to have dust under the bed for another 12 years as these men didn't hang about! It is so high! I will feel a bit like the princess and the pea and need a ladder to climb into it! As long as it is comfortable and allows my back to straighten out I won't care. And then immediately after the bed arrived the chair I'd picked up in a charity shop came. It is much too good a chair for my ramshackle living room but does look good and oh it is comfortable! So a morning that crept away from me. Nothing got done and I feel that I have wasted a perfectly good day. I spent a long time looking for a pack of ribbon to post off for an order and going quietly mental when I found it eventually with all the other packs. Why it ended up there I don't know as I had put it out in a prominent place so that I got on with the packing. Sometimes I wonder if my brain is on hold for part of the time!

Looking at my day through what seems like the wrong end of a telescope just brings home to me that I am not as organised as I'd like to think I am. With the limited amount of time at my disposal I can't afford to waste it. By waste I mean aimless meanderings not the productive thinking processes and viewing times that will lead to work output eventually. Sometimes we need to stop and stare to refresh ourselves; to stand back and look with new eyes at what we are doing so that it doesn't get stale and samey. But I find I am making coffee and wandering around straightening things up and generally not getting on. I don't know why this is because once I do get started I'm fine and the energy flows. I wonder if this is a reaction to having to go to work! I work part-time....five afternoons a week! And not creative work! And the fact that my mornings are now truncated is having a big effect on how I view my creative work. Especially as I give classes on one or two of those mornings. The classes I love and I think I could happily do classes all week but then I would need more time to do the preparation. Oh its a chicken and egg situation. I must go and achieve something before the day is over and then I will feel good with myself!

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